Join a gym and gain instant access to equipment that makes you look like you know what you’re doing while you secretly follow a single sweaty tutorial video. Membership also grants unlimited towel drama, heroic locker-room storytelling, and the luxury of pretending your post-workout snack is “for recovery” instead of emotional support.

Hours for the Gym are below (Click here for detailed schedule)

M-F 130pm-5pm

Saturday 11am-8pm

Sunday 7am-6pm